Tuesday 15 July 2008

Chapter 82

Al was wandering up and down the aisles, Teek and Hugh hot on her heels. Teek was surprised when she’d pulled out a list; he’d not seen her do one!

They were on aisle four and all three trolleys were groaning, ‘Miel, I think we need more?’

‘No shit Sherlock! Are you sure you need this much stuff??? We can go shopping tomorrow you know! And where are we going to put this stuff while we carry on? I daren’t even think how it’s all getting home.’ She was having a little panic about everything, yes she’d got another fridge and deep freezer in the basement, but damn she didn’t think her cupboards would take all this lot!

Tico’s phone went, Al rolled her eyes, it was Jon’s ringtone, ‘Hey bro, yeah four, we’ll wait. They’re on their way.’

‘Yippee!’ More eye rolling and muttering ensued.

By now they’d picked up some followers, and they weren’t fans, the store security team! Al nearly died; this was her local store, shit! The security guards weren’t even trying to remain covertly watching them; they just stood at the ends of the aisle, both ends, watching what was going into the trolleys. She knew what they were thinking, shoplifters! She wanted to die! And she noticed some of the girls she knew by name, watching them too, wondering what was going on. More security men turned up, she’d counted at least ten, she groaned wishing the floor would open up, and swallow her whole!

‘Honey, we’re home.’ Richie bellowed, as they manhandled their heaving trolleys around the corner, nearly taking out two of the guards. You could see the guards do a double take at all the alcohol and juices in their trolleys and wonder if they’d got enough staff on for this.

‘Jesus, CD, Lurch, Blondie, did ya leave anything for anyone else?’

‘A bit.’ David laughed.

‘Mike should have sent one of the buses to pick us and the shopping up soon.’ Jon grinned, then he realised Al wasn’t happy and was flushed and looking about her. he knew they hadn’t been rumbled, so why was she worr ……… oh fuck he thought, looking at the tight wall of security and someone who looked like the manager descending their way, aw hell!

‘Erm, excuse me Miss.’ Looks like they figured Al for the mother of the rowdy kids.

She flashed him a dazzling smile and prayed it looked real, ‘Yes can I help you?’

‘Ah well madam.’

‘Please call me Alice.’ Again the smile, Jon was proud, she’d learnt to hit them right between the eyes with her version of his mega watt smile.

‘Well, Alice, we’ve notice the amount you’ve been putting in your trolley, and wondered if you’re having a party or something? He tried to smile, the woman didn’t look like a shoplifter, but he wasn’t sure about the men she’d got with her, wearing sunglasses indoors, posers!

‘No….’ Glancing at his name badge, ‘Tom, this is what happens when friends come to visit.’ Nodding at the men who’d now converged behind her, ready for a fight if it came to it. ‘They may act and sound like children, but trust me they don’t eat like ones.’ She laughed, and Tom raised a chuckle.

‘And how will you be paying for this today?’ He edged backwards as the men with her frowned at him.

Jon stepped forward and flashing him a grin he used for journalists said, ‘I’m payin for it Tom, with my card, I’m assuming you take Amex?’

‘Yes sir of course we do.’

‘Well now how about you find us a checkout and we can start putting this through, load it into the bus and then carry on shopping; would that make you less nervous of us?’ He grinned again, but more feral. Jon handed him his card, Tom glanced down at the name on it and his head snapped back up and scanned everyone in front of him. Jon had just taken off his glasses and Tom got the full impact of the Bon Jovi baby blues!

Tom started to sweat as the other men took off their glasses, holy fuck he’d just accused Bon Jovi of shoplifting, holy fuck!

Al saw that look, and noticed the security guards seemed to waver, looks like the boys were known, bugger! She placed her hand on Tom’s arm, ‘Don’t sweat it, you’re doing your job. Mistakes can happen, breath honey, breath.’ The guy looked like he was about to keel over.

‘Mr Bon Jo..’

‘Call me Jon.’ Jon didn’t want people overhearing his name.

‘Jon, I’m terribly sorry, I didn’t mean to imply….’ Tom dried up like a desert, parched and bone dry.

‘Tom its fine; like Ally said, you’re only doing your job. But if you can help get us through with this lot and let us carry on shoppin it’d sure be appreciated. Ally gets stressed if we don’t get it all in one go.’ He gave him a conspirital wink, and Tom chuckled.

‘Only if you gentlemen will agree to have a photo taken for the store news letter, we have many famous people come in, but never this big.’ Tom knew he was brown nosing, and his mother raised no fool, but who cared! He knew these men, his mum was a major fan, and shit he’d better get an autograph for her otherwise she’d kill him!

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